Monday, November 24, 2008

How To Command, Influence And Control People


The Styles and Methods of Power

Power is the ability to get things done--your way. Sometimes it's

a direct order that you give, sometimes a suggestion you make, or

a request or the asking of a favor; but the result (if you have

power) is always that the other person acts and you derive a benefit

from the other person's actions.

One can have power in many different ways. You have it over your

employees because you pay their salaries. If you are an expert in

a special field, it's because you know the best way to handle

matters. In a legal dispute, it's because you have the law on your

side. If you have credit cards, it can be part of your life style

to go into a store, hotel or restaurant, in any city, and order

whatever you wish. In politics, it's because folks will give you

their votes, hoping that you'll work and succeed in getting the

government to serve them in their area. And there's the power

that derives from being talented, charming and capable; of being

up-to-the-minute and knowledgeable, so people know if they let

you handle things for them or listen to your advice, they'll

come out ahead.

One more aspect of power. This concerns competition. If all

the world were fair and equal, one would have no need for the

upper hand, for the advantage, for power. But, of course, the

world isn't. Which often means that in a competitive situation

you cannot merely settle for an equal chance. You must keep

your eyes and ears, and indeed all your faculties, open for

any clue or other tips that will move the balance in your

favor. Whenever possible, make sure you get more than an

equal chance.

You have to look the part

People are impressed by how a man looks. They are often not aware

of exactly why they treat one man like a VIP and another gets the

bum's rush. Their reactions maybe subliminal, below their

conscious awareness. But take it from me, if you're well

dressed, neatly groomed, hair trimmed, etc., and are driving a

snazzy car, you'll be well received; while a guy who's wearing

sloppy clothes, unshaven and unclean, and who's driving an old

heap, will hardly get any attention at all. Look as good as you

can; and back it up in other ways.

Add the other elements of power image too. Clothing--it's worth

investing some money to be well dressed. Buy suits on time

payments if you can (a credit card is very useful for this).

That way the clothes are helping to get power, and therefore

money, for you while you are paying for them. Don't forget about

the car you drive around in; if the one you have is not impressive

then rent one that is. Rental cars don't cost that much and

driving a good one pays dividends in the power sphere. Try to

join clubs and organizations (business, social, political) that

have important and influential members. If at first you can't

become a member, then maneuver a member into taking you as his

guest.

Money and power beget money and power; the more they think you

have, the more you'll get.

We must repeat that, for most people, those who belong to the

power elite are those that appear to belong to it. Unless

recognized personally, a millionaire will be turned away from

a class restaurant if he's not well dressed.

You have to consciously act the part of one who is used to

being in command.

There's another extremely important factor in appearing to

already have money and power beyond what I mentioned above

and that is your own manner of doing things. You must move,

speak and act power. Have you ever met the grandson of a man

who amassed a fortune and wondered how a grandfather who did

so much could have a grandson who seems like such a weakling?

It's true; that grandson could never get rich on his own; if

he hadn't inherited his family's money, he'd be poor because

he's week and incompetent. And it shows. The men who, like

yourself, are capable of making money now, are men who can act

in a strong style that almost seems to draw money like a magnet.

Language, and the way you speak, can say as much as the ideas

in your words. Equally important, however, is your body

language, that is the way you stand, walk, move and sit and

the gestures you make.

Be the man who's in demand

Power isn't just you being able to call someone and tell him

what to do; it's also other men calling you and asking for your

business or wanting to associate with you. If you're a man who

seems to possess a wide knowledge of the world, an awareness of

trends, if you're the early-bird who catches sight of

opportunities first, if you're the man who's capable of

handling many different kinds of situations, then people will

seek you out. They'll invite you to vacation at their country

homes, to meet their influential associates, to join their social

clubs and their business syndicates. And when they do, all of

these will enhance your image of power, and widen your power base

so you can zoom ahead even more.

When the fight for power gets harder

Everything we've said so far will be useful in just about every

situation; but when the struggle for power gets more intense,

some other methods are needed. When the person(s) you're

talking to has been open-minded and your powers of persuasion

have been working from the moment you first stated talking, the

usual techniques can be used. But what if you're dealing with

someone whose mind is closed to your ideas and influence

from the start, or who feels he is in direct competition with

you? Then things must be handled somewhat differently.

Most important, be in control of the situation at all times.

If you feel your control is slipping, do something to regain

it. You could do something vividly dramatic and totally

bewildering to the other person, like suddenly shouting or

pounding on your desk. Or you could press a secret buzzer

to have someone rush in and interrupt when the other side is

coming on too strong.

Never ever get into a power struggle when you're at any kind

of a disadvantage; if you're tired or if the discussion turns

to a subject in which the other guy is an expert. Always

focus your own mental energy and project your thoughts into

his mind. Look him in the eyes, try to gain his confidence.

Always have a picture in your mind of a victory over this

person bigger than the victory you need to achieve your aims.

And whatever you do don't lose; that is, if you realize that

you can't beat him, then leave. It's better not to have a

victory than to have a defeat.

Say Whatever does the Trick

Making a lot of money is largely a process of convincing

people, of selling yourself, your service, your product. And

the trick is to tell them what they want to hear. The problem

is to find out what they want to hear. So you'll start out by

giving them basic information about what you're selling. You

then continue with your sales approach, always watching their

reactions carefully. When you see their eyes light up and they

then lean forward with interest, then continue on the topic that

aroused that interest, no matter how odd it may seem to you.

And do the opposite when you reach any of the usual parts of

your presentation, if the prospect shows less than the normal

amount of interest; that is, shorten that part and go on to

the next.

From start to finish

You start out by telling them what the product or service is or

does. The kinds of benefits people get from using it and some

examples of ways, both usual and unusual, that other folks have

used it. It often helps to mention that "Mr. Anderson, you know,

the big shot, just bought two of them for his own use," or that

"the XYZ Corporation recently bought seven of them for their

executives." Or if you're selling a more heavy duty item, that

"Smith's Construction Company has been using them for years."

If it's almost a custom made item tell them they're one of the

select few who will even get a chance to buy it. If you have an

opportunity to talk to his wife or a friend of his, plan along

with that other person and have them unknowingly hinting to the

customer that "it certainly sounds like a good deal." If his

kids are with him, get them to needle him into buying it. Use

any method that works.

Suppose the guy seems convinced buy he can't seem to make up his

mind to actually hand over the money or sign the contract to make

the purchase. Sometimes it helps to imply that he really can't

afford it. He might buy it just to show you he isn't poor or a

cheapskate. Another great strategy that sometimes works in

desperation to close a sale is to make him feel guilty if he

doesn't buy. Imply that he deliberately wasted your time and

energy, that he's rotten and thoughtless, that he just wanted to

make a phony impression on his wife or girl friend or anyone who

is there with him. You might want to say all this very loudly,

almost yelling, so that a crowd gathers and you shame him into

buying. Or you can try another method to clinch the sale, offer

him a "special bonus." Say you'll give him a longer time to pay,

or a contract for "free" servicing or that you'll add on a bonus

of another item "free". Actually he may have been entitled to

this "extra" all along, but if you haven't yet mentioned it, then

now's the time. Try to keep one or two things in reserve as your

last pieces of ammunition.

To sum it up

Prepare in advance so you know the other man's point of view; if

you're able to benefit him, he'll practically jump at the chance

to let you make money off him. Tell him what he wants to hear.

And above all, keep eyes and ears open for any information, clues

or tip-offs, favorable or unfavorable, that will give you the

power to persuade him.

In the power battle called life, victory will go to those who find

the right weapons and use them. So keep your weapons handy; get a

head start and don't lose it. Be alert for clues you can use to

your advantage. Present yourself with confidence; broadcast your

will power, speak and move with assurance, and, to make sure they

get the message, have the clothes car, office and the other outer

appearances of power and money. People tend to believe what they

see, and if you look like you've got it made, then you will have

it made.

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